Many people think of relationship counseling as something to seek out when their relationship is falling apart or heading towards divorce. However, if you seek counseling earlier, you can often prevent a relationship from degrading. So what are some signs you should see a relationship counselor?
You don't feel as though you're able to communicate effectively.
Communication is key to a good relationship, and when it starts to break down, the relationship starts to break down. If you feel like you cannot express your feelings openly to your partner, or if you feel like they are not able to understand or process what you say, then it is time to see a counselor. The counselor can help you develop skills to communicate and listen better, and they can also serve as a mediator to help you both communicate about hard topics.
You've discovered your partner keeping secrets.
While you do not have to tell your partner everything, you should feel comfortable telling your partner everything — and you should not be intentionally keeping things from them. They should not be keeping things from you, either. Keeping secrets is usually a sign of a bigger underlying problem such as a lack of trust, and a therapist can help you work through that underlying issue so you're not as tempted to keep things from each other.
You're not connecting physically.
Everyone has different habits when it comes to intimacy. There's not necessarily anything wrong with your relationship if you only have intercourse once a week or once a month, while some of your friends do it daily. What can be a red flag, though, is a sudden change in intimacy. If you used to have intercourse weekly, for instance, and now it has been 3 months, then there's probably something going on beneath the surface that is best addressed with the help of a counselor.
You argue a lot.
Do you feel like you're always bickering and arguing over seemingly small things? Often, when you are fighting over little things, it is because you really need to discuss a bigger issue, which can be difficult. A counselor can help you address the issue that you're struggling to identify and address.
A few sessions with a relationship counselling professional can help you commicate better and understand what issues there may be in your relationship. Usually, when it comes to counseling, the sooner you seek help, the better off you are.